I can’t be the only one

I believe there must be other people out there who have experienced severe pain attacks. I have been suffering from them monthly for the past 5 years. It starts off as a burning in my abdomen that quickly spreads to my chest. Then BAM….instant pain coursing throughout my body. It feels like a vice is around my rib cage, squeezing all the air out of my lungs. In addition to that, I feel an elephant or bowling ball is on my chest. Also, it feels like someone is pouring hot oil all over from my hips to my pelvis. Intense pain between the shoulder blades. Stabbing, “fire poker” pain in my left, upper abdomen, behind my ribs. This “fire poker” pain feels like a sharp, searing pain, followed by a feeling of ripping out of my flesh; like someone is repeatedly stabbing me with a fire poker. It feels like a hamster is trying to scratch & crawl its way out from behind only my left rib cage. I break out into a sweat, yet my teeth are chattering and I’m freezing cold (I have been told that this feeling of being cold despite sweating is my body going into shock). I lay in a fetal position crying, wrapped in a blanket, trying to gain control of my breathing. I lie there, in intense, debilitating pain, until the attack ceases; anywhere form 30-60 minutes. Once the pain becomes tolerable I’m weak, spent, exhausted. All I can do is drink water and curl up to sleep. I’m dazed, light headed, unsteady.

Fake It Til You Make It

Yes, this is a picture of my kidney. Isn't that crazy? On the right of the screen is my left kidney showing my Nutcracker Syndrome. You can see all the loops of extra veins that popped up to help drain my kidney. The surgeon said that I'm so tall and lanky, my torso so long they really had to crop down the pictures.

I have been the worst blogger. I have been up north at the famous hospital since July 3. I miss my husband and I miss the sunny southern days. But this visit up north is paying off. It turns out I have another disorder (of course) called May Thurner Syndrome. Apparantly, it's pretty common for people to have both this syndrome along with nutcracker syndrome. I have surgery scheduled for Aug 2. I'm getting a stent put in my left iliac vein (around my pelvis). This is supposed to create a large channel for drainage from my kidney. It's a better option than putting it near the renal vein. I have a 90% chance of the stent lasting 1-2 years (no idea what happens after that; it's one of my pre-op questions) and 60-70% it will relieve my chronic flank pain. Also, it leaves the option open to go back to the kidney at a later date (hopefully after I have babies) and manipulate the renal vein.

After the surgery I will obviously need healing time. I'm so happy my husband was able to take off work that week to be my nurse. :) I'm afraid my upcoming posts may not be food related. I have some really great beauty products I ordered I must share because they turn my pale, sickly face into a glowing, semi-healthy looking one (just don't look at my medicated-glazed eyes).


I'll try to get some posts up soon. Right now I'm just taking time out to concentrate on getting my health back on track and see how I heal up after the surgery. And to all you who have wished me luck and sympathized with me on twitter & instagram thank you. It's nice to hear from others who know what living with chronic pain is like. I'm trying my best to stay strong and positive for the upcoming surgery even though I'm anxious. But I have to look forward to the outcome and not let my nerves get in the way; I'm faking it (no anxiousness) til I make it (not anxious). This is a step forward in regaining my health.

Strawberry Salsa

Well, we are still slowly transitioning into the Paleo diet. Mr.Surly is following it stricter than I am. I'm finding it a bit stressful to think of various meals that fit the criteria. Mr.Surly has already lost some of his winter weight (a pant size) from the diet and exercise. I think I'm down about 5 lbs, I'm trying to gain that back; I can't lose any weight. I'm still trying to maintain my weight and even gain 5 lbs to be at a healthy weight for my height. Mr.Surly wants to lose weight and get back in shape. Mr.Surly noticed an immediate positive effect from the diet. He feels fuller, needs less snacks during the day, and no longer needs his usual afternoon coffee.

The diet is also supposed said to be good for autoimmune diseases . I can't vouch for how it affects my GI issues because I'm still using dairy and eating wheat.

Keepin' it Real

I have been a horrible blogger, especially food. For some reason Feb and Mar were medically really bad months for me, I was having more attacks and side effects. This led to my doctor upping my klonopin which makes me extremely sleepy but has helped with the pain. Then my rheumatologist found problems in my blood work, suggesting I could have some horrible, serious chronic illnesses.

For this reason I haven't been cooking. I'm also scared to eat because of the side effects. I've been sticking to "safe" foods for me. The most I do is pop some chicken and a rice medley in the oven and bake. Or make pasta. Mr.Surly has been really great about the whole thing. I know he'd like more variety and better meals but I just cannot gather the energy to stand in the kitchen to make a normal meal.

Last week was hell. I had two doctor appointments. On Monday it was with my GI doctor. It went well, we are reducing my seroquel xr dose (Yay!). It is a horrible drug. I take it to sleep but the side effects are horrible; hallucinations, short term memory loss, vivid dreams, conversations with people that never happen (that I was sure had happened). So we made a plan to taper off of it and talked about possible issues with my pancreas.

Then, Wednesday, was an appointment with my nephrologist. I had a severe pain attack the night before, so he ordered bloodwork to check my pancreatic enzyme levels, as well as repeating my rheumatologist bloodwork. We're hoping it was just a fluke the first time. Then after feeling my abdomen he told me I needed to go get an emergency MRI; not what I was planning. I hate MRIs; I'm extremely claustrophobic. Luckily, I always carry my ativan with me for flare ups, so I took one before the MRI. I was not planning on spending my whole day in the hospital so I was glad to get home and crawl into bed. That incident kept me in bed the next day. And I have been chronically fatigued as well.

Mr.Surly wants to start the paleo diet so I have been researching it. I have no idea how I'm going to implement it. I guess I'll just gradually introduce it. I'm hoping this will help with my recent increase in pain; I'll try anything to get rid of the pain.

I apologize for the lack of food posts. I will eventually get some up. In the meantime I have some non-food related post ideas.

Please bare with me until I rebound; and I will rebound, I always do.

I hope everyone is enjoying their spring. Thank god, sunny, warm weather is here.

Starbucks Pumpkin Scones

Out of all the tasty treats Starbucks offers my favorites are the Pumpkin and mini vanilla scones. Good Lord, they are so freaking good. So you can imagine my excitement when I saw this pin on Pinterest for the recipe. The first time I made them they were cakey and soft. They tasted good but weren't the texture a scone should be. So I went about changing and adapting the recipe until I finally got it right. The winning adaption is this recipe. I used coconut milk because I like it, but I'm sure any milk would work. Also, I have quit cooking with butter (due to the fact it's fat content hurts my stomach) and now use coconut oil, which is easier on me. If you are a butter person then feel free to substitute butter for the coconut oil.

I used pumpkin puree that I had frozen from this past fall. When the sugar pumpkins went on sale I bought a few of them, roasted and pureed them, then froze them in 1/2 c bags. I thawed the bag in the fridge overnight and used it in the recipe.

I got impatient waiting for the sugar glaze to firm up which is why my spice glaze is hard to see. I just wanted to get one of these guys in my tummy asap.

These are so good; it's hard not to eat the whole batch in one day. If you have any left, store in airtight container

Egg & Bacon Breakfast Muffins

Yes, you read the title correctly; these muffins have bacon in them. Well, turkey bacon to be exact. Which is still bacon, which means, to me, it's evil. I have always hated the taste and smell of bacon, even as a child. My sister would chase me, as she ate bacon slices, taunting me "Come on, I know you want a bite." I had to jump on the swing set and swing to avoid her and that awful bacon aroma.

These muffins were made, out of love, for Mr.Surly. These are my second attempt. The first time I tried making them I burnt the bacon (hey, I never make the stuff). So they were just egg muffins. They are incredibly easy to make and are a great grab & go breakfast. I made them in a muffin tins, and even with cooking spray it was hard to get them out. The second time I used silicon muffin cups and it was so much easier to remove the muffins. I wish I had a silicon muffin pan but unfortunately I do not; I only have individual silicon cups which I put on a baking sheet and it worked out fine.

The All-Day Beret

I wasn't going to do a knitting post, since technically, this is a food blog, but I get so many compliments on this hat I thought I'd share it with fellow knitters. If you don't know how to knit, this is a really easy pattern; not hard to teach yourself to make.

I wanted a casual hat to wear since it's chilly in the morning and warm during the day. I used cotton yarn because wool would be too hot down here in the south. I loved the look of this beret when I saw the pattern online. It's from Stitch Nation by Debbie Stoller.

Everywhere I go I get compliments on this hat. Everyone wants to know where I got it. They are amazed when I tell them I made it. I consider myself an average knitter and it took me a day and a half to knit this. I thought I'd share the pattern with others so they can get compliments, too.

When I knitted the pattern as written it swallowed up my head; I have an extremely small head. It was way too big for me so I experimented by making a few adjustments to the pattern. After much trial and error, I succeeded. I only cast on 92 stitches, instead of 104. And when it came to knit the diagonal sections I made them 2 inches, not 4 inches.

I knitted my hat in the round, not on circular needles. I started the ribbed part with size 5 double pointed needles, then began the diagonal stitch with size 8 double pointed needles.

I'm extremely happy with the result.

Since I used 100% cotton yarn, it has stretched out a bit, but I haven't washed it yet and a quick dunk in the sink should shrink it back down.

I can't believe such a simple, easy hat garners me so many compliments (from men and women of all ages) so I just had to pass it along and share the pattern.

Click here for the pdf, knit it up, wear it out and revel in the compliments you will be sure to receive.

Any questions, ask in the comments.